Sam: A Law and Order SVU Fan Fiction
On a blistery cold winter night, Detective Olivia Benson sat bleary eyed over musty manila folders on her cold desk. Detective Munch sauntered in.
“We just caught another case. Get ready for another long night.” The other detectives all sighed. Another night away from family, from loved ones, from sleep. But the special victims served here in the sixteenth precinct took priority and with good reason.
Detective Stabler took a seat on the edge of his desk, his hands clasped in his lap, asking “So what are we looking at here?” Tutuolla, Stabler, and Benson all looked toward Munch with anticipation.
“A dancer at the Pussycat Lounge downtown was attacked and sexually assault tonight as she was leaving work. Benson, Stabler – head down there and interview the witnesses. Tutuolla, Craigin is sending us to canvas the area. Let’s see if we get lucky with any neighboring security cameras. Big brother is always watching.”
Dark and musty with the scent of beer, the Pussycat Lounge was not the most inviting environment. A woman in an array of mismatched lacy underthings tossed their long flowing hair perfumed with the scent of cherry blossoms intermingled with cigarette smoke on the stage. Benson took a seat at the bar.
“Can I ask you a few questions?” she inquired. The music was loud and the broad backed bartender with salt and pepper hair was fixing a drink. Benson asked louder. The bartender turned around and approached Benson with a slight smile, a smile that Benson returned. Something clicked inside Benson at the sight of the handsome woman. Her dark brown eyes with their liquid centers, her masculine jaw, and well muscled arms as she carefully placed her hands on the bar.
“Can I help you?” the handsome butch asked. Benson pulled herself together and took out her badge, displaying it and answering “Yes, I am here to ask a few questions about the assault on one of your employees earlier tonight. She’s in stable condition at St. Vincent’s. Did you notice anything unusual tonight?”
The butch sighed, “Yeah. Actually, do you mind if we take this outside? I’m due for a smoke break.” Benson nodded and followed her outside.
“Sorry, I didn’t catch your name in there,” said the butch as she fidgeted in the pocket of her Levi’s for a pack of smokes.
“Olivia, Detected Olivia Benson,” she offered, “and you?”
“My name is Sam Murphy,” she said as she brought the cigarette to her lips. Her hands looked rough, like the hands of the women she knew growing up who worked in the canning factories upstate. Strong women, resistant to conforming to socially accepted women’s work and gender presentation. Olivia drew her eyes up to meet Sam’s gaze, self conscious about observing Sam’s gestures so intently.
“It was mostly the regulars tonight,” said Sam as she inhaled, “but there were a few new faces. But one stuck out.”
Benson’s ears perked and her eyes widened as she waited for Sam to continue.
“Yeah, well, he was real quiet. Sat inside at the bar and watched the dancers for a while. Slowly sipped on a few drinks. He bought one for Stacey. You see, it’s not a lapdance club. If you want a dancer to spend time with you, you gotta buy her a drink. She sits next to you, flirts, but there is no touching and no lapdancing. We don’t have the license. Anyway, just before the end of her shift, he disappears. I think he must of headed out the back. We got a back door out there by the bathrooms. He coulda just slipped outside. I am so angry this happened to one of my girls.”
Olivia felt simultaneously repulsed by Sam’s paternalism and comforted by her concern.
“Can you describe him?” asked Benson as she took out a small lined notepad and pencil.
“Geez, I don’t know. Nothing notable. Average white guy, thirty-something, clean shaved, dark polo shirt maybe and jeans.”
“Anything else?” Olivia asked, as she fingered the pages of her notebook. Her eyes met Sam’s. They were smiling. In this moment, Benson felt a warmth come over her. She found herself immensely drawn to Sam. A breeze passed suddenly down the wind tunnel of the avenue and the scent of cigarettes intermingled with cheap aftershave.
“Yeah, can I give you my number? Maybe we can meet for drinks some time. I mean, not here….” Sam trailed off.
Olivia smiled and bit her lower lip. A rush of courage came over her and she said, “I’ll think about it” as she reached out her notepad and pen for Sam to scrawl her number down.
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The piece I read to prepare for this was entitled “Jealousy” and was a suggestive slash piece about Dr. B.D. Wong and Detective Stabler.
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While I was less interested in the comic book piece, “A History of Fandom” was actually quite interesting in understanding how fan fiction came to be. I find it so interesting that it began in response to science fiction, homoeroticism, and women carving out a space for their own creativity. I also found it interesting most of the same gendered eroticism that emerges from fan fiction is between men and not between women. I wonder if I just had a lapse in research or if this is actually the case. While I don’t imagine I will write more fan fiction in the future, I have been an avid fan of Law and Order for years. During my recovery from wisdom tooth extraction, I watched marathons with my father. Maybe it was the haze of pain killers and all the delicious chocolate pudding in my system, but I was hooked. Even though the plots are completely predictable and SVU in particular can be really intense and problematic, I can’t seem to pull myself away. I always thought Detective Benson’s character could be queer. Their is something subversive about her and the lack of a storyline around her romantic inclinations leaves room for creative interpretation. As such, I created a love interest for her loosely modeled after Leslie Feinberg’s main character in Stone Butch Blues.It is often the presence of a queer romance that femme identity becomes visible. Bringing the character Sam into play created space for Benson’s queer identity to emerge and begin to be explored.